This time last year, Groovin the Moo morning, I was excited and petrified at once. I was embarking on an adventure I’d never experienced before. About to shoot a music festival with no experience and a small child I was reluctant to leave all day.
The sun was shining with a pleasant forecast for the rest of the day so I didn’t have todays worry of protecting my gear from the rain. I prepped my gear, charged batteries, formatted cards, cleaned lenses and packed my bag.
I have to go by myself? No!
At the last minute, my friend that was coming with me to write the story, backed out with a sick child. You know how it’s not so scary doing something scary with someone else? And when you do it by yourself there is no one to make those jokes with, no one to egg you on, or to help you see theres nothing to worry about.
Now I was even more petrified. My brain went crazy. You don’t know what you’re doing, you suck, you’re going to fuck it up. I wasn’t going to go. I was so afraid and looking back, I’m not sure what it was I was afraid of. I suspect I was afraid of doing something new and unknown and of looking like a fool.
Having someone in your corner can help
In the end Mr Indie convinced me to just suck it up and go for a little while. If I didn’t like it, I could leave. Once I got there and worked out where to go (I had no clues at all!) I had an amazing time. The energy from the performers is high, the photographers are snapping like mad all over the place. The buzz and excitement from the audience vibrates the air.
Last year
Last year Groovin the Moo came at what was the beginning of a new phase in my life. I’d just cut off my long hair in to a mohawk and dyed it pink. Not so much a midlife crisis but more a conscious act of doing something just for me – without worrying about what others might think. I was so self conscious but I was making tiny steps towards who I wanted to be.
Last year, I nearly missed an experience of a lifetime simply because I was afraid. Not of anything tangible. Just afraid.
Working through the objections …
This year nothing’s stopping me. It’s raining, so I’ll wrap up my gear. It’s going to be muddy, so I’ll clean up the boots I haven’t worn in forever. Last year it was loud, so I’ll wear ear plugs. My writing buddy can’t make it, so I started drafting the article last night leaving gaps to review the performances (and I’ll remember take a notepad this year ;))
How to get through the mental blocks
Meditation, journalling and setting a daily intention for myself is helping me so much to get past the the voices that tell me that I can’t do it.
My intention for today is to have fun and not worry. My affirmation is “I am calm, I am energised, I can do it.”
Grounded in logic, I know that I can do it. I know that I don’t need to impress anyone. I know that I’m not going to be hurt by taking on an adventure, only by how I perceive it. One of my favourite quotes by Epictetus sums it up pretty nicely.
“Men are disturbed not by things, but by the view which they take of them.”
And another favourite just for that extra boost of motivation.
“It is not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It’s because we dare not venture that they are difficult.” Seneca
What practices do you use to bust through the fear?